What you don't see are mentions of children, a husband, a significant man in my life.
If you look back a year or so at my posts, you'll find plenty of mention of a significant someone who was once a part of my life. I haven't deleted those posts because they are a chronicle of my past, and I wouldn't be who I am today without that person.
We dated for almost 8 years.
Yes...a really long time. The reaction I would get from most people was "WHAT?! EIGHT YEARS?", and then almost inevitably, "why aren't you married yet?"
I'll spare the full story, but basically, we were high school sweethearts who spent the last two years of our relationship several states apart. We had a plan that involved us winding up back in the same state and getting engaged, then living happily ever after... the perfect ending.
Fast forward to last spring, and he decided to stay 1,400 miles away in California, not ready to get married, not ready to progress in our relationship.
Bottom line, I felt we had reached a no-win situation and that he was giving up on us. So, I made the incredibly difficult decision to end our relationship.
After nearly a decade of investing time, memories, feelings, into a relationship, I was back at square one, on my own for the first time since I was 16. It was without a doubt the hardest thing I've been through in my life.
But here I am, seven months later, doing just fine. I love my life and the people in it, and I have learned more about myself and what I'm looking for than I ever thought possible. Instead of dwelling on the past, I focus on moving forward.
Too often I see friends, and even people I barely know, staying in a relationship with a person they know isn't right for them, because they are terrified of the unknown, scared to be labeled the dreaded "single."
I would rather be single, just me, with an open heart ready and waiting for someone who will love me fiercely and fight to be with me, than be in a relationship that isn't fulfilling.
I hope one day my posts will include pictures of a boyfriend, fiance, then husband, in addition to all these other wonderful faces, but until the Lord finishes writing the next chapter in my love story, it's just me. And that's okay.